1) Why was the neutron star so excited to see Pikachu? Because it wanted to catch them all with its gravitational field! 2) Two neutron stars are sitting at a bar, when a magnetar walks in. One neutron star turns to the other and says, "Oh no, not a magnetar. They always try to steal the limelight with their super powerful magnetic fields." The other neutron star replies, "Yeah, they think they're so special just because they have the highest magnetic fields of any known astrophysical object."
3) A neutron star walks into a bar and sees a TV star sitting at the counter. The neutron star says, "Hey, I'm a big fan! I've seen every episode of your show."
The TV star replies, "Really? I had no idea neutron stars could watch TV."